The Magic of Midlife Healing

Will Functional Medicine Save Me From Biologics?

I’m 49, and I have never been more uncomfortable in my own skin. Literally. It burns, itches, and I scratch it 24/7/365.

I’ve had psoriasis since I was 24. Then came hypothyroidism—because autoimmune diseases love to bring a buddy or two along for the ride. Things were going fine until they weren’t. Over the last year, my psoriasis flares became unbearable and stopped responding to treatments. Conversations with my doctors went nowhere when I complained about exhaustion, sluggishness, and losing half my hair. I begged for a full thyroid panel. They tested TSH only and told me my levels were fine. They dismissed my concerns, convinced me the other tests didn’t matter, and sent me on my way.

Then perimenopause hit.

Night sweats. Anxiety. Boiling rage over tiny things. Brain fog. Life got difficult fast. Depression set in. But the straw that broke the camel’s back was my consultation with my dermatologist about starting a biologic—a medication that retails for $3,500 a month, requires self-injections, and would suppress my immune system. As she explained the process, all I could think was: This can’t be the right next step.

I was miserable. As I sat in her office, listening to her walk me through my options, my eyes glazed over when she said, "Full disclosure about Tremfya. I am one of their speakers." Instantly, all I could picture was a scene from one of those Sackler/OxyContin exposés—confetti cannons, T-shirt guns, and a dancing OxyContin Pill hyping up the crowd at a pharmaceutical-sponsored event. I went into shock, stopped at the lab to have my blood drawn for side-effect monitoring, then went home and had a good cry.

For the next two days, I spiraled into a research rabbit hole. Everything about this plan felt wrong. The idea of being on a medication like that for the next 30 years of my life was sobering. (And terrifying.) My sense of unease was compounded by my hypothyroid issues, peri-menopause symptoms, and an overwhelming feeling that my body was a twisted, disfigured mess in permanent decline. How would suppressing my immune system and spending thousands each month make any of this better? Especially in the current medical landscape?

I had to listen to my gut.

Then I stumbled across a podcast that was referenced at the end of a random Reddit thread. I listened, and suddenly, lightbulbs started going off:

• A psoriatic liver looks the same as an alcoholic liver?

• Psoriasis shouldn’t itch?

• Psoriasis is a bowel disease that can be successfully treated with bile acids and bioflavonoids?

Why had no dermatologist mentioned this option to me in 25 years?

I consider myself "crunchy," and the older I get, the more skeptical I become of the American healthcare system. It’s a racket—catering to corporations whose primary goal is to keep you chronically ill and dependent on pharmaceuticals.

So, I decided to go the alternative route and work with a functional medicine doctor. On Monday, I had my bloodwork done. Now, I wait for the results and the treatment plan that will hopefully help my body heal itself. I was tired of watching TikToks about supplements and YouTube rabbit holes, throwing spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks. I wanted real answers and that required real tests to see what in the actual hell is happening to me.

This Substack will keep me accountable as I embark on my journey to wellness. I have a healthy skepticism of both conventional and alternative medicine, and I want to document what worked for me and what didn’t. Maybe my journey will spare another woman some suffering. (That would be the ultimate win.)

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My List of Symptoms:

• Psoriasis (Scalp, Severe): The itch is unbearable.

• Nasal drip and congestion

• Low back pain (1 year): 8 weeks of PT helped, but it's not gone.

• Hypothyroidism

• Anxiety & Depression

• Low Energy: 30 minutes on a treadmill feels like work.

• Weight Gain: Visceral fat despite averaging 1,600 calories per day.

• Sluggish Metabolism

• Chronic Inflammation

• Hair Loss

• Intermittent Smoke Smell: Since COVID, comes and goes for weeks.

• Dizziness & Lightheaded Spells

• Menopause Symptoms: Brain fog, irritability, memory loss, exhaustion.

• Sleep Issues: Wake up at 3 AM or earlier no matter what time I go to bed. Take hydroxyzine at night; without it, I wake up multiple times.

• Heart Palpitations & Afib: Happened last summer; After extensive testing, the cardiologist says my heart is fine.

• Burning, Itchy Ears

Every two weeks, I’ll update you on my progress. This is at the tip-top of my goals for 2025. So buckle up, girls. We ride at dawn, and I fear it's going to be a bumpy ride. I’m bracing for the mindset shift I’ll be required to make to be successful—learning that food is not fun, entertainment, or a reward for good behavior or a way to drown sorrows. I’m hopeful this path will bring me the relief I so desperately need, but I also know there will be hard days ahead.

Let’s do this.

P.S. I also write hilarious and heartwarming Paranormal Women’s Fiction with fierce, 50+ heroines teaming up with Karma to take down bad men. If that is your jam, order my books here.